Hugz 'n' Kissiz XOXOXOXO

Shawty Imma Beast

2011-05-20T01:48:00.001-04:00

Capo 4th fret

Am7 C/b C
Tell yer grrlfrendz about
How I turn that body out

C Fmaj7
Wichita summers and crystal lakes
Aw, the moon it shone across yer face

Now I'd lose focus and I'd shut down
But somehow I still hung around
Somedays

Cause I had something in my eyes
Errytime I'd look to the sky
At least that's what you said

When it got real close to June
My birthday was coming soon
I'd say

Shawty Imma beast
Now just come lie down
Shawty Imma beast
Now just come lie down
Errytime I come around
You know I shut it down

Brand new sheets on an empty bed
And aw, yer running through my head
Today

But I knew you'd head away
When it got to Labor Day

Am7 C/b C
So lie down in this bed
Cause shawty Imma beast
Errytime I come around
You know I shut it down
Tell yer grrlfrendz about
How I turn that body out

© Sean Nolan 2011

Shawty Imma Beast

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

Virginia 2

2010-12-17T16:33:00.001-05:00

This one was a battle to record. And the timing's all off, and the drums are stupid, but I couldn't be bothered with it anymore. Oops!!!!

Virginia, I'm Not Willing To Settle For Less

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

It's Not Working!!! (Electric)

2010-12-13T14:24:00.000-05:00

It's Not Working!!! (Electric)

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

Virginia, I'm Not Willing To Settle For Less

2010-12-12T17:44:00.001-05:00

F C C/b
I guess a year is a long time
But it's funny those minutes that seem to take so long
Don't seem so long when you count them
As part of the years that go by so fast
That go by so fast

And it hurts everytime
You try to pull my head down outta the clouds
Back into the real world
Cause the real world is fucking lame compared to
my Star Wars-laced dreams
To my Star Wars dreams

Am C
Virginia, do you really think I'm so naive?
Am C F
Naw Virginia, I'm just content to live in my dreams
Virginia, until something better comes along
Am C
But Virginia, I'm not willing to settle fer less
F G C
Settle fer less, settle fer less, settle fer less

See most people have cushions
That they use to protect their souls from all the scary things in life
But I threw all that shit out
Who the fuck knows why? But I'm bare to the sticks
And I'm bare to the stones
I'm bare to the cold

So fer me a princess kitten angel
You know she's gotta be just right
Cause I'm 15 kinds of fucked up so where I'm
Missing she's gotta be there; she's gotta be light
Where I'm dark

C F
I only wanted her cause I thought that's what she wanted
And if it's not what she wanted, then fuck it, then fuck it, I'm gone

Virginia, I'm Not Willing To Settle For Less

© Sean Nolan 2010

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

It's Not Working!!!

2010-12-10T15:57:00.003-05:00

Cmaj7 G6 D/F#
Ahhh.....

I've been trying lots of things to make us fall in lurv
Like create a telepathic connection between you and I
To show you all my plans and dreams sent from up above
Oh it'd be so beauitful you couldn't help but cry
You would cry

I've been drawing charts and diagrams to explain my brain and hrrt
I've been trying to dream extra hard so it'll hafta come true
I've been dropping lots of hints, trying not to come apart
Cause I know if it worked it would help bring me to you

Cmaj7 Asus
If it worked, we could lay down together
If it worked: Magick dreamz 4ever!

Fmaj7 G6 Cmaj7
But it's not working

I tried to write a song fer you, even tried to make it rhyme
I tried to play it different so you'd never see it coming
But you weren't fooled fer a second, you knew each and every line
But if it doesn't work grrl, yule still hear me humming
Along

If it worked, there'd be no cloudy rainy weather
If it worked, we'd have no need fer never
But it's not working!!!!

It's Not Working!!!

© Sean Nolan 2010

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

Grrl, You Don't Mean That Much To Me

2010-11-25T18:22:00.005-05:00

Cmaj7 Am7
You took me to the drive-in fer my birfday
Yer skin as soft as hand-spun silk
Yer eyes caught the moonlight: it was beautiful
As I said, "Now quiet down baby: errybody's gonna hear."
And when they kicked us out
Grrl, we couldn't help but laugh
And yer eyes caught that light again
When you said, "Let's go back home fer the aftermath."
And nothing could compare to you
Grrl, nothing could compare to you

Cmaj7 Em
But don't get to feeling safe
Don't ever get to feeling too safe

Cmaj7 Am7
Baby grrl, I could drop you any day of the week
Grrl, you don't mean that much to me
Baby grrl, I could drop you any day of the week
You don't mean that much to me

The first night I met you was a Sunday
I remember cause of how guilty I felt
In the back of yer Lexus
With the outside world all covered in rain
You said we was praying
Just in a more beautiful more spiritual way
I was drunk enough to believe you
And grrl you looked like heaven that day
And nothing could compare to you
Grrl, nothing could compare to you

But I hope yer not feeling safe
Grrl, don't ever get to feeling safe

Cause baby grrl, I could drop you any day of the week
Grrl, you don't mean that much to me
Baby grrl, I could drop you any day of the week
You mean nothing to me
I can make lurv to anyone in the world
So what does that make you grrl?
Nothing
Nothing

Grrl, You Don't Mean That Much To Me

© Sean Nolan 2010

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

Sex And Sweet Perfume 2.0

2010-11-20T16:29:00.001-05:00

I made a really sweet rock version of this song. I'm really proud of it. The transitions between the slow and fast parts are a little awkward, but I think you get the point. Also, I'm still trying to get my voice back, so it's not perfect, but I think it's really awesome!!

Sex And Sweet Perfume 2.0

© Sean Nolan 2010

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

Sex And Sweet Perfume

2010-11-19T23:57:00.002-05:00

So yes, my voice is totally shot, but I lurv this song, and I wanted to get something out on the google-machine. I'll record a better version later. I promise.

C#m E
Yer laying, oh yer laying in my bed
But yer thinking of all the things that he said
And yer singing, oh yer singing in yer sleep
All the things that you could not say to me

And yer skin, oh grrl I feel it on my skin
But the distance in between is filled with sin
And I'm dreaming, yes I'm dreaming it's okay
But all my dreams will die today

A E
Yer a silver-screen actress without any practice it seems
Yer a beautiful mistress with beautiful dresses and dreams
And everyone's so impressed how you never make a frown
A B
But grrl yer falling down, yer falling down

C#m E
Yer laying, oh yer laying in my bed
But yer thinking of all the things that he said
And yer singing, oh yer singing in yer sleep
All the things you could not say to me

And he'll sneak oh grrl he'll sneak right in yer room
Drowning you in sex and sweet perfume
And he's stealing, oh he's stealing you away
And all my dreams will die today

A E
Yer a cocktail waitress that's starting to hate the scene
Yer a night-to-night dancer with a little romance in between
Yer an ancient queen with a shiny golden crown
A B
But grrl yer falling down, yer falling down

C#m E
So take all yer kisses far away
Maybe I'll see you again someday
But fer right now just sail away to sea
And I guess that's good enough fer me

© Sean Nolan 2010

Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Home 2.0

2010-11-18T17:32:00.000-05:00

I wrote this song back in February 2009. Nostalgia.com

Home 2.o

G6 Fmaj7 Am7 Fmaj7
When I think back on you, I always think of home
Just a couple of kids who should never have been left alone
Am7 Fmaj7 G6
And I miss you now
And it's strange to think how
G6 C/g Fmaj7
We can never go back home
We can never go back home
We'll always feel alone
We can never go back home

When you think back on me, I hope you think of home
I hope yer doing fine, now that yer out there on yer own
And I miss you now
And it's strange to think how
We can never go back home
We can never go back home
We'll always feel alone
We can never go back home

© Sean Nolan 2010

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

The South Is Sexy 2

2010-11-03T23:53:00.003-04:00

Did a fuller version of the song I wrote yesterday. Might have made it a bit messy, but overall I'm pretty pleased.

I Understand The Lights Are Bright Over There Grrl, But The South Is Sexy Too

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

Cowgrrlz 2.0

2010-11-03T15:30:00.001-04:00

Fun with Cowgrrlz. Not really all that great considering how good the song is, but it ain't my fault I don't know anything about drums/have any patience.

Drunken Cowgirl Serenade

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

I Understand The Lights Are Bright Over There Grrl, But The South Is Sexy Too

2010-11-02T16:56:00.002-04:00

Cmaj7 Fmaj7
The sex bleeds from the streets of this town
'N' errybody's just rubbing it in my face
If I was more violent I'd take a tire iron to the legs of any young gentleman
Then sneak in and take his place
But I got the hrrt of a kitten grrl

My point is that I'd lurv to hold you close
But we all know morality and joy, you can't have both
And I was too busy trying to look down yer shirt
So you never knew how much I hurt

Am7 Fmaj7
Out in Hollywood they're all full of joy
Out in Hollywood erry grrl's got her boy
Salvation's all around, but it's just laying on the ground
So shh grrl come back down south

Gadd4 Fmaj7
I'd show yer pretty face
A brand new hiding place
But it ain't real tonight
It ain't real tonight
I guess it just ain't right

I did my fair share of the hard work
But I got stuck with the whole bill
I mean if I was more bitter, I'd make the perfect supervillain
But my hrrt's too soft and there just ain't money in it anymore

I ain't going out to Hollywood
Baby grrl you can go there if you please
But there's snow on the ground, come here and play around
Shh grrl come back down south

I'll show yer pretty face
A brand new hiding place
But it ain't real tonight
It ain't real tonight
And I ain't here to fight

Come downtown, little grrl just stick around
Darling don't you jump the gun
Come downtown, little grrl just stick around
Darling don't you jump the gun
Come downtown, little grrl just stick around
Darling don't you jump the gun
Come downtown, little grrl just stick around
Don't you wanna have some fun?

I Understand The Lights Are Bright Over There Grrl, But The South Is Sexy Too

© Sean Nolan 2010

Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Take Me Home 2.0

2010-10-09T00:13:00.000-04:00

Also updated "Take Me Home"

Take Me Home 2.0

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

Southpaw 2.0

2010-10-08T01:01:00.002-04:00

Made a song with drums. I'm not sure I know enough about drums to have done that, but I did anyway. Oops. There are also a ridiculous amount of effects on errything because I was having fun.

Southpaw 2.0

Also, here's a more accessible version of the update I did to "I *heart Pretty Grrlz..."

Pretty Grrlz 2.0

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

Southpaw

2010-09-30T00:48:00.002-04:00

G Em
I was talking to yer boy the other day
Just to see what kinda things he had to say
Try and test this idealmetababygrrl complex
C
And make sure you really are the best

But I already knew about yer long brown hair
And I already knew about yer piercing stare
But most of all I already knew this one thing grrl
The fact that you exist made me feel better about the world

D Em C G
Southpaw when you move yer body like that
Southpaw, you give me a hrrt attack
With robotic precision in yer laser gun
Yer trying to tell me I ain't the one

D Em C
But aw naw kitten, yer wrong
Aw naw kitten, yer wrong
Aw naw kitten, yer wrong
Aw naw kitten, yer

This crazy little computer program pops up in my head
Where I test erry impossible permutation of who's laying in yer bed
I can't help but think about you erry minute of erry day
So come on please meet me half way

G C
Now southpaw I ain't no kinda scrub
I'm pretty all right myself
I'm the kinda boy you could take home to yer mama
Put my picture on yer shelf
I'd lay in yer bed in my dreams
I'd lay in yer bed in my dreams
I'd lay in yer bed in my dreams
I'd lay in yer bed in my dreams
So southpaw come on grrl
Southpaw that ain't right
Southpaw who are you fooling
Tonight?
I'd lay in yer bed in my dreams
I'd lay in yer bed in my dreams
I'd lay in yer bed in my dreams
If I ever had any control over what happened in my dreams

Southpaw

© Sean Nolan 2010

Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

I Rly ♥ Pretty Grrls

2010-09-24T15:37:00.002-04:00

I was having some fun with this song again today. Added other instruments and things. Turns out I can't sing in key or play things in rhythm. Also I'm bad at the bass. Oops!! (I think you can only hear the song if you're signed into some kind of Google thing like gmail).

I ♥ Pretty Grrls Way More Than I ♥ Croatia Trying To Get Into The E.U.

Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Senorita

2010-09-16T22:08:00.002-04:00

G C

Maquiladoras lined the Texas border
Of the town where you grew up
Yer daddy had a tequila still in yer back yard
And he wouldn't let any boys see ya

Oh senorita...

You gotta be careful with assholes
Because they might just be a genius
And I hope when I act like an asshole
It's because I'm a genius

Oh senorita...

At night you'd go out dancing
And all the boys just wanted to touch you
But I was content to watch yer body move
In the dim light of the cantina

Oh senorita...

So I'll act like an asshole
Just to prove that I'm a genius
And those boys there sure are assholes
But I don't think any of them's a genius

Oh senorita...

Amaj7ish Fmaj7ish
And the night starts to dim down
As the sun sets over the Rio Grande
And I'll sneak outside yer room
But yer daddy's making tequila neath the moon

Emaj7ish Fmaj7ish Gmaj7ish Fmaj7ish
I tell myself Imma wait outside till all the lights go out
But I trip and I fall, and you turn on every damn light in the house

F#mish Fmaj7ish
Yer daddy runs inside
And comes out holding his gun
Screams out, "Boy I'm gonna kill ya!"

F#mish G#mish Aish
But I'm already on the run
Yeah I'm already on the run

G C
I don't know if I'll ever see ya
Seems like the gates of Heaven are between us
But I'll never forget the way yer body moved
In the pale light of the cantina

Oh senorita...

And yer daddy sure is an asshole
But I ain't much of a genius
And I'm sorry I acted like an asshole
But yer daddy, he's the meanest

Oh senorita...

Senorita

© Sean Nolan 2010

I forced myself to use weird chords and change the keys. Unfortunately, I don't really know how to sing to that. I tried, but I'm pretty sure I didn't do a good job at it. I still like the song though.

Git low, baby grrl,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

When Even The Stars Of Jersey Shore Are Having Existential Crises: I'm Fucked

2010-09-05T13:15:00.003-04:00

Capo 6th Fret

C F

I've been spending a lot of time wondering
About how it feels to kiss a pretty girl on the lips
I guess it's something I've done before in some other lifetime or something
But it seems like I won't ever again

I've been spending a lot of time wondering
About the positives and negatives of being alive
And I know it's completely fucked up
But it usually just leaves me wanting to die

G F C
Oh mama, come wake me up
Oh mama, come wake me up

It's hard to know which things are right
But it's easy to know everything I do is wrong
I don't even have the courage to talk to my friends or parents
And when even the stars of Jersey Shore are having existential crises: I'm fucked

Every positive quality I ever had
Is just a negative quality in disguise
I'm selfish and cowardly and I can't do this anymore...
...

Oh mama, come wake me up
Oh mama, come wake me up

I just wanted to love somebody
I don't care if anybody loves me

When Even The Stars Of Jersey Shore Are Having Existential Crises: I'm Fucked

© Sean Nolan 2010

Sorry about the bad words,
It's poison kids, my bad,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Baby Dream Beauty Queen

2010-08-29T23:00:00.001-04:00

C Cmaj7 F Maj7

Baby dream beauty queen
I've been staring at yer legs fer too long

G F C Cmaj7
These lurvbugs git in yer head and make you do silly things

Good morning angel, maybe the sky is bright blue
All I ever wanted was to lie down next to you
Good morning angel, maybe the sky is bright blue
Truth is I don't care what color the sky is, just wanted to lie down next to you

Point a gun at my chest, you know silver bullets are the best
Take my heart away from me; I haven't used carefully
Take my lurv and bury it deep so that I can go to sleep
Or maybe baby just a kiss; just help me get up outta this
It weighs so heavy on my heart

Baby dream beauty queen
I've been looking in yer eyes too long

Baby Dream Beauty Queen

© Sean Nolan 2010

It weighs so heavy on my heart,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

My Happiness Is Buried In Dream I Ain't Ever Even Had

2010-08-25T21:35:00.002-04:00

C C/b Am

My happiness is buried in dreams I ain't ever even had
Fractured blurry visions that went bad
I don't know too much about these dreams
Except that sitting in them's you and me

Oh Isabella you were sitting right there
Oh Isabella you were sitting right there

Lonliness and depression's a tiresome affair
When it's gone you don't want it and you don't like it when it's there
So bury me deep below the sea
Lonliness and depression's all yule ever get from me

This one time I think I actually had a dream
You and I were walking down the street
I don't remember much about that dream
Just that it was the best thing that ever happened to me

Oh Isabella you were sitting right there
Oh Isabella you were sitting right there
So bury me deep below the sea
Just to make sure some things will never be

My happiness is buried in dreams I ain't ever even had
Fractured blurry visions that went bad
But Isabella you were sitting right there
Isabella you were sitting right there

So bury me just bury me just bury me deep below the sea
Cement shoes tied so carefully
And Isabella you were sitting right there
Isabella you were sitting right there
Isabella you were sitting right there
Isabella you were sitting right there

All I ever wanted to touch was yer skin
All I ever wanted freedom from was sin
All I ever wanted to taste was yer tongue
But they tell me baby boy you ain't that young

So bury me deep below the sea
Cement shoes tied so carefully
All I ever wanted to dream of was you
But I'm sinking in these carefully tied shoes

Isabella you were sitting right there
Isabella you were sitting right there
Isabella you were sitting right there
Isabella you were sitting right there

My happiness is buried in dreams I ain't ever even had
Fractured blurry visions that went bad
All I ever wanted to taste was yer tongue
But they tell me baby boy you ain't that young

Isabella you were sitting right there
Isabella you were sitting right there

My Happiness Is Buried In Dreams I Ain't Ever Even Had

© Sean Nolan 2010

Gosh,
Good God, Grrl,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Hey Belinda Carlisle, Hell is a Place on Earth Too

2010-08-21T23:47:00.002-04:00

Here's a song that's not about a grrl. It's also a cheap Dylan ripoff, and I'm not crazy about it, but I got the song title in my head and just had to make a song out of it.

Em (3-2-0 on G string)

The Devil's down by the river
Talking bout the world's end
Charging you a dollar
To wash away yer sins

The preacher's up on the hill
Drunk and full of fire
But nobody will listen to him
Not even the village choir

F#m F Em
These are the times that try men's souls
The path to Hell is paved with gold
Hell is a place on Earth

Little Mary Lou she ran off
With that stranger when he came
Nobody saw his face
But they all knew his name

The crickets keep getting louder
Like a plague each night in yer dreams
But we ain't got no Moses
He left town last week

So button up yer coat
Cause a cold wind's staring to blow
Get down on yer knees
And maybe Jesus'll save yer soul

Hey Belinda Carlisle, Hell is a Place on Earth Too

© Sean Nolan 2010

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

Take Me Home

2010-08-12T23:47:00.002-04:00

Am Em
When I drift off to sleep
You know that same old dream comes rushin' in
Yer standing by yer car
Am F
Yer laughing at me, and you open the door
G
And you tell me to get in

C F G C
Drive me home, put yer arms around me: ruby red lips and eyes of blue
Just like in a dream; It only hurts cause it ain't real
Kiss my lips just like in the dream; put yer arms around me when you take me home
I've had one too many, but you know it's never enough; put yer arms around me and then take me home

Sometimes you drink
To force yer mind to dream that same old dream
But yer eyes they don't shine
And the door it ain't open, and I suddenly become
Aware that you ain't mine

F G Em F
Take me home, take me home; I ain't young enough to dream anymore

Take me home, wrap yer legs around me; Oh darlin' I never saw you like this before
Oh God, oh God it's just a dream, and it hurts cause it ain't real
If you'd had a couple more, we coulda crashed yer car to wake us up from this dream
Sure it might hurt, but now ain't this worse? Dreaming a silly old dream...

© Sean Nolan 2010

Take Me Home (Direct MP3 Link)

Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Begging And Choosing

2010-07-10T16:51:00.001-04:00

Gee, it'd be nice if I could actually sing...

Begging And Choosing

C Fmaj7 Am7 Famj7

Listen up baby grrl
Cause I ain't saying it twice
I got this feeling in my chest
We gotta run away to paradise

If I ever looked you in the eyes
You turned my heart to stone
Like Medusa but better
And It chills me to the bone

Cause with you baby grrl
I'm begging and choosing
Cause I want lurv so bad
But it's gotta be you and

I just wanna see you blush
And turn yer eyes to the ground
Well if I had anything to do with it
It's gotta be lurv that I found

Am7 G
Fer you baby grrl I've been begging
And it's you baby grrl I've been choosing
Fer you baby grrl I've been begging
I'm begging and choosing and begging and choosing
And begging and choosing and if not then I'm losing

Fmaj C G
Oh I'm losing
Oh I'm losing

So listen up baby grrl
I've already said it twice
I need yer lips on my lips
I need to stare into yer eyes

I need to feel you close
Feel yer breath on my skin
Please just need it too
Please just let me in

Then we'll beg and we'll choose
We'll beg and we'll choose
We'll beg and we'll choose
Darling we can't lose

We're begging and choosing
We're begging and choosing
We're begging and choosing
Oh God, good God grrl

© Sean Nolan 2010

Hello from the real werld,
Robotz n lurv n crushes n StrWrz as always,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

You Were Always A Princess To Me

2010-05-27T22:34:00.003-04:00

C
Well the world has seen its share of kings
Fmaj7 C
And there's been a lot of pretty diamond rings mmmmmmm

So there's not much special outside our dreams
In this wide world full of queens

Am7 c/b C
But you were always a princess to me
You were always a princess to me

If you ever smiled at me I don't care
If you meant to or not, it sent my heart flying through the air

And if you ever smiled at anyone else
I'd reach out and steal 'em fer myself, catch 'em in a big wide net

Am7 Fmaj7
I'm sailing the seas
Like I'm Christopher Colombus and yer that Isabella or whatever her name was and I'm sailing just fer you

So put on yer crown babe, put on yer dress
Cause you know I think yer the best

And God I know I mean nothing to you
But one day good God grrl, I'd really like to

You Were Always A Princess To Me (Direct MP3 Link)

© Sean Nolan 2010

See you in a little bit Athens,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Sean Nolan Writes Another Song About A Grrl, Or All The Beer In Athens Just Ain't Enough: Live

2010-05-24T21:22:00.002-04:00

Sean Nolan Writes Another Song About A Grrl, Or All The Beer In Athens Just Ain't Enough

Goodness, I didn't realize I was playing that fast.

Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

Sorta Like A Lurv Freddy Krueger... I Think...

2010-05-19T01:10:00.004-04:00

C Csus4
I just wanna look inside yer dreams
Just to see what's happening
I just wanna see inside yer head
When you lay it down to bed

If I could see inside those dreams
I would change some things
I'd put me right next to you
Just hoping it would come true
I'd hold you so tight
That when you woke up in the night
You'd be wishing I was there
Cause you'd know how much I care
Oh I would change some things
If I could see inside yer dreams

Am F C G

Every night I get down on my knees and pray, Oh God I pray

I would change some things, put myself in summa yer dreams

Sorta Like A Lurv Freddy Krueger... I Think... (Direct MP3 Link)

© Sean Nolan 2010

Orange juice is the best,
G'night dreamers,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

I Just Want Something Like This To Actually Happen

2010-05-13T01:45:00.003-04:00

C F G

When the sun is sinking low, I just wanna see ya, I just wanna see ya
Or when the moon is shining bright, I just wanna see ya, I just wanna see ya

Everytime I have a drink
Yer always there in my mind
And God I just can't think
About anything else
Yer body silhouetted against the dim light of the bar
My heart just flies away [space gibberish]

I look up at yer hair
Against the pale light of the moon
And kiss yer tender lips
On this warm night in June
I just want it to happen, I just want it to happen, I just want something like this to actually happen

Then I pull you close
And tell you yer the one
...
Now don't that sound like fun?

I just can't think about anything else

I Just Want Something Like This To Actually Happen (Direct MP3 Link)

© Sean Nolan 2010

I tried to pull off soul, I didn't. Oh well...

Will you confuse my lurv fer the Cobwebs,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Undergrad By The Numbers: Metanerdism

2010-05-10T15:46:00.004-04:00

6 Years
12 semesters
1 BBA in Accounting
1 BA in History
1 Music Business Certificate
1 Classical Culture Minor
3.97 Overall GPA qualifying for graduation with Highest Honors
4.00 GPA ignoring classes taken for my History major and Classical Culture minor which I will never use
4.00 GPA for Accounting, the degree I actually care about
3.93 lowest GPA I ever had
75 # of courses for which I received credit
19 # of courses I received credit for before entering the university
56 # of courses I took
208 total credit hours I received
3.91 GPA in honors classes
3 # of grades that weren't an A or an S (2 A-s and 1 B)

I'm a nerd, a metanrrd,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

More SNIDRSB 2K10: The Heartbreakening Pictures

2010-05-09T22:41:00.001-04:00

Thx Ashley!!
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Good God, Grrl: The Song

2010-04-22T00:06:00.004-04:00

Amaj7 576600 Emaj7 0 14 13 13 0 0

Good God, grrl
I think about you in the morning when I wake up
And again at night when I go to bed
I think about you when I'm thinking bout you
Thinking, thinking
Good God, grrl

And I'm thinking that yer smiling
Oh no no
God I gotta stop this thinking, thinking oooh

Good God, grrl
And we're walking down the street
Hand in hand
And yer saying something I can't understand
Cause I'm too buys staring in yer eyes
Getting 6 kinds of hypnotized

You laugh at me fer being so in lurv
But yer dreams are all kissiz and hugz
Too oooh

Good God, grrl
Let's do something reckless
Let's get in trouble grrl

Good God, grrl
Let's do something timeless
Do something priceless
Let's just do something, do something

Good God, grrl
And the stars are shining up so high
Let's get completely wasted
Wasted
And try to count them all in the sky

And we'll never let anyone tell us no
Oh no no no
Oh no no no
Ooh
Good God, grrl

Good God, Grrl (Direct MP3 Link)

© Sean Nolan 2010

I'm not crazy about the recording, but I kinda like the song.

Keep the Dodgers in Brooklyn,
Two Hands Ginobili,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Good God, Grrl

2010-04-20T23:35:00.004-04:00

Good God, grrl
You've somehow got
All this
Beauty
And Charm
And Style
And Hair
And Legs
And Everything
All shoved into this limited amount of skin
And
Good God, grrl
It makes me wonder
How Good God could fit it all there.
Magic prbly...
And I guess it's to be expected
Because it always feels like
It's never felt this way before
And it'll never feel this way again
And it's always this one-of-a-kind thing
And yer always perfect
And it's always all like
"There's no better grrl in the world"
And it sorta gets you thinking
Good God, grrl
How many yous are there in the world
Because it happens too often for one and only
Even though it feels like that
And
Good God, grrl
Which one of these Greek goddess princess angels is actually you?
And
Good God, grrl
I know I don't go about it the right way
But good God, grrl
What else am I supposed to do?
I'm so captivated by the slightest inkling on robot zombie super magic
That I basically have to fall in lurv with every pretty grrl that walks by
But it's not really like that
Because some of them are like bosses
Video game bosses
You know like there's a bunch of Goombas and Koopas
But only a few Iggy's and only one Bowser
So I guess I'm looking for the boss
Because some of these grrls mean more than others
And while all these goombas and koopas take my lives (it's okay though because I'm cheating and I have 99 extra lives)
I've beat a few bosses
But I'm struggling getting to the final boss
And that's all I really want
Ever since I was a kid
All that's mattered to me was lurv
And
Good God, grrl
I just wish I could have it
Because
Good God, grrl
I'm great at it
I mean yeah, I make mistakes
But so does erryone
And
Good God, grrl
You'd forgive me
Yer sweeter than sugar
And I try
Good God, grrl
I try
To be all these things you;d want
But
Most of all
To be myself
Which is supposed to be what you want the most
But you don't
Which is weird
But
Whatevz
But
It gets me acting stupid sometimes
And there's these gorgeous flowers
And I'm wearing these boots
And I just crush them all
But they were beautiful
So I feel like a robotzombiewerewolfapocalypse.com
And
Good God, grrl
Are you you?
Or is she you?
How am I supposed to know?
I guess that's why Good God invented dating
Which still baffles me
So I just keep Sadie Hawkins dreaming my way through life
Hoping
Good God will do whatever happened in Freaky Friday
To make
You me
And make
Me you
And it's stupid to hope for that
Because it will never happen
But I'm counting on it
And I ache every day
Waiting for something I know is impossible
So I guess you can forgive me if I seem a little strange
(Because I am ♥ Moz)
And so
Good God, grrl
I'm somehow stuck
Here
Same as I was when I was in 6th grade
And I got my first crush on you
And it lasted 6 years
Same as now when I apparently grossly misread something and got my 16,000th crush on you
On you
On her
And her
And her
And her
And goodness...
All this lurv I give, you'd think
Karma would bounce some back to me
Or something
Good God, grrl
And sometimes it does
And I truly cherish that
But not as much as I give
And it makes me feel selfish
But everyone is selfish
So whatevz?
I just don't understand how I got so incompetent at errything
It's like someone put a heart inside a robot and it just didn't get it
Idk, bad simile
Whatevz
But yer name just won't leave my lips
And yer face won't leave my mind
And yer legs
And yer laugh
And all these things
And the future
And the past
And the present
It's all kind trying to make me crazy
But I won't really let it
Somewhere along the way I acquired a strong will
Pretty convenient
Because it allows me to be pretty normal
Until I decide to ruin errything
And act like a child
And I am still a child
Just a boy
And I don't know how to grow up
Good God, grrl
I was thinking
You can't be a man
Until you have a kid
But Good God, grrl
You can't have a kid
Until you wrangle a sweet baby princess angel
But all these wimin want a man
And it just doesn't make sense
Good God, grrl
I imagine it's the thinking that does me in
Too much thinking
I never do anything
And I know that
But I'm no good at doing
I'm so good at thinking
Except sometimes
Good God, grrl
When I'm great at doing
And foolish at thinking
And yes
I know
That erryone lurvs me
But nobody lurvs me
So what does it matter that erryone lurvs me
Good God, grrl
I'm perpetually a fucking teenager
And I never grew up
I'm just trying to fit in
With an American Eagle polo
And a 7th grade haircut
And a complete lack of knowledge about how to get grrls
And a complete and foolish desire to get grrls
Good God, grrl
Dreams are the worst
Because sometimes yer there
And it seems so real
And you try to force them into the pillowcase so they don't fly out the window because you want them so badly to be real
But they're dreams
And
Good God, grrl
I'm glad I'm completely in lurv with myself
It helps overcome my self-deprecating nature
I think I'm the best at everything
But I also think I'm the worst
And everything I am contradicts everything else so that I am that it gets so tiresome to care
And I just do everything on a whim
Sort of
Except that I think about the things I do a ton
I just never do them
Sometimes
Good God, grrl
Are you following?
Because I'm lost
Always
With my head in some cloud
Yoda would not be proud
But I've got all this clutter shoved in my heart
Enough for like 6 people
Which makes me feel bad for the 5 other people with empty hearts
And
Good God, grrl
I'm proud of errything I am
I've worked hard to be what I am
To embrace kindness
To avoid judging others
To lurv unconditionally
To work hard
To do all this stuff
Just fer you
And
Good God, grrl
I want you so deeply to care
To be proud of me
But yer not
Because I don't know who you are
And sometimes I see glimmers of you
In these grrls
And I think it's gotta be you
And I want it to be
But who knows?
Idk, it's all crazy
Everything's always all crazy
Good God, grrl
What are we to do?
Anyways...
I just wanted to tell ya
I think yer pretty
And I like yer hair
And I'm glad yer mom likes me
And I didn't like that movie much either
And that's my favorite song on that record too
And I'm so proud of his first stolen base
And all these things
To you
Good God, grrl
They're laying here just waiting fer you
So please come get them
Before they blow away
Good God, grrl!!

You can only get better at stuff by trying,
Case in point (pending future, better poems),
Good God, grrl,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

SNIDRSB 2K10: The Heartbreakening Footage Surfaces

2010-04-14T14:57:00.007-04:00

They said it would never happen. They said all documentation of this historic performance was lost forever in the great storms of 2010. Recently, however, some footage has surfaced, teaching us all just how heartbreakening a Heartbreakening can be. Here is the incomparable Sean Nolan performing his hit "The Captain Bows Her Head, Removes Her Hat, and Her Crew Shed A Tear," a nautical tale of plunder, mystery, and murder.

Also, here are some pictures from during "Sugar Sweetheart"

And one more picture from I'm not sure when with Keri and Mike being awkward in the background.

Maybe someday some more footage will surface from this industry-changing moment in musical history...

My heart is ragged and damaged and poor, but it's all yers hunny.

Keep the Dodgers in Brooklyn!
Will you confuse my lurv fer the Cobwebs,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

She's About...

2010-04-08T00:27:00.002-04:00

F Fm C
She's about 5'7" or something
Never been too good at guessing numbers
F Fm Am C
All I know is how she makes me feel
F Fm C
Woke my heart up from a 10,000 year slumber

She's about to make me lose my mind
God, I thought I was getting better
But I just care about how she makes me feel
Oh, this grrl I gotta getter

C
Just to look at her, Just to look at her
Am
Makes you feel like you never felt before
Just to look at her, just to look at her
Makes you feel like you never felt before
Just to hear her name, just to hear her name
Makes you feel like yer heart's gonna jump outta yer chest
Just to hear her name, just to hear her name
Makes you feel like yer heart's gonna jump outta yer chest
C Am
She's the kinda grrl
F Fm C
Makes you feel like there's some good in the world
She's the kinda grrl
Makes you feel like there's some good in the world

She's about a million miles away
Guessing ain't gonna help that number
But I just wanna know what it'd feel like
To hear one yes from her

C Am
From her lips
From her lips
Watch her shake her hips
Yer heart sinks like a ship

She's About... (Direct MP3 Link)

© Sean Nolan 2010

Keep The Dodgers In Brooklyn!!
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Goodness, If I Was The Boy And You Was The Grrl And That Was The Dress, I'd Wipe Yer Tears Away

2010-03-24T00:45:00.005-04:00

C
She was born in a town in the south of Georgia
F
After her mama moved up from Florida
Am F
Raised her good and taught her right from wrong

You met her when you was in grade school
And yer daddy said, "Boy, you gotta play it cool!"
But how can you keep yer head with a grrl like that?

Her eyes are a pale and piercing blue
And when she looks back, it's right through you
But you swear one day yer gonna catch her gaze

And now yer grown and she's going out
And while yer busy trying to figure what she's about
She walks by and she's wearing that dress

And it fits her like a glove
Oh God, it fits her like a glove
And it always shows a little too much
But it never shows quite enough
She's wearing that dress
And it fits her like a glove

So you told her about all yer biggest fears
The kinda stuff that'd bring her to tears
Hoping that she'd fall fer a sweet young boy

But she was looking fer a man
Wasn't interested in holding hands
Cause this is the real world not a dream

So now yer lonely boy what do you do?
Cause she won't even look through you
Like she did back when you was kids

You miss her smile and you miss her grace
Yule never wipe no teardrops off her face
When she's sitting there crying all alone in that dress

Oh boy wipe her tears away
Don't matter if she don't want you, wipe her tears away
Just be that sweet boy you been all along
Treat her right and never do her wrong
If she wears that dress fer someone else
Be a man, don't think about yerself
Oh boy wipe her tears away
Don't matter if she don't want you, wipe her tears away

Goodness, If I Was The Boy And You Was The Grrl And That Was The Dress, I'd Wipe Yer Tears Away (Direct MP3 Link)

© Sean Nolan 2010

I might've pushed my Hank Sr. voice a little hard, but it just felt like a country song to me.

Beware The Heartbreakening,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Their Names Were Ghosts

2010-03-16T23:10:00.004-04:00

G D Bm C
Wait... Just one more chance
Stay... Past the last dance
Though you said everything you needed to say late last year
These apparitions won't leave me alone here
G Am C
Yer name is a ghost to my lips
Am C G
Yer body haunts my fingertips

Wait... I'm scared of the dark
Stay... Help me light a spark
I know it's hard to believe I'd be the best you ever had
And all these ghouls flying round ain't gonna change that
Yer name is a ghost in my head
Every night when I go to bed

Bm C
And the cobwebs build up
Things vanish without a trace
And the lights all go dim
Am G
My heart's a scary place

Wait... As all the candles burn out
Stay... Till I figure it out
My lurv is strong and true as can be; I'll put up a fight
But I can't trust a spectre in the absence of light
Yer name is a ghost in my heart
Tearing it apart

I was hoping this song would turn out better than it did. Oh well...

Their Names Were Ghosts (Direct MP3 Link)

© Sean Nolan 2010

Keep the Dodgers in Brooklyn,
Two Hands Ginobili,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

OMG, My Sisters Are The Best!!

2010-03-05T22:14:00.004-05:00

Siobhan just drew this really sweet picture of me and a wlf I captured. I lurv it a ton.

Don't forget, Fiona also drew me a really sweet picture I lurv.

Katie hasn't drawn me any pictures, but she's still great too.

I ♥ my sisters. Also, Fiona is turning 21 Monday... That's crazy!

Will you confuse my sisters for zombies,
Now my heart is full,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Sort Of Interview Thing

2010-03-05T13:51:00.003-05:00

There was this guy on the FAWM website who put out a request seeing if anyone would be willing to do an interview based on completely random questions. I figured I'd give it a shot, so I recorded my answers to the weird questions. So you can listen if you wanna. The whole thing was a little crazy, so I ahd to do it. It's explained a little better here.

Weirdo FAWM Interview

Will you confuse my love fer the Cobwebs,
Robotzombiewerewolfapocalypse.com,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Wlfshrt Chic

2010-03-03T22:53:00.003-05:00

Oh, goodness, I've written another song...

Wlfshrt Chic (Direct Link To MP3)

Am
I was staring at yer eyes in the light of the moon
Just trying to figure out my favorite color soon
I was staring at yer skin in that little dress
F
Just trying to figure out when they'd have to lay me to rest
Am
Oh just lay me to rest

You were freezing cold, I shoulda given you my coat
But I was too busy thinking about these things I wrote
Now I'm freezing cold everywhere I go
And God I just wanna go back home
I just wanna go home

F Am C F
I just wanna go home, this part of me will always be alone
I just wanna have a home, some part of me will always be alone

I was staring in the future at these little kids
Just trying to figure out where their mother hid
I was staring in the past just trying to find you
Then I realized my past is my present too
And my future too

I was staring at a grave in the setting sun
Just trying to figure out if battles ever get won
I was staring deep inside right at my soul
And I couldn't find anything to hold
Nothing to hold...

C F
Be Alone...

© Sean Nolan 2010

Shut up, tiny robot doctor,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

My Favorites: Top Fifteen

2010-03-01T00:45:00.003-05:00

These are my 15 favorite songs I wrote last month:

1) Oh God, Wait Till You Hear This Joke!/Goodbye Baby
2) A Sadie Hawkins Dream
3) Waking Up From A Sadie Hawkins Dream
4) Juliet Sometimes
5) Sean Nolan Writes Another Song About A Grrl, Or All The Beer In Athens Just Ain't Enough
6) I ♥ Pretty Grrls Way More Than I ♥ Croatia Trying To Get Into The E.U.
7) Sugar Sweetheart
8) ...Dreams Of Robots And Lasers And Things
9) Heartache Is My Job And I'm Employee Of The Month
10) The Captain Bows Her Head, Removes Her Hat, And Her Crew Shed A Tear
11) Keep The Dodgers In Brooklyn!!
12) Faced With The Possibility Of Death For The First Time In His Life, Young Eli Compiles A Cursory List Of His Favorite Things About His One True Love
13) I'm Perpetually A Fucking Teenager (Sara Bell)
14) Kid, I Only Wrote All Those Songs Fer You So You'd Sleep With Me
15) Hey Grrl

Time fer bed,
And tests,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Hunny, I Was Just A Kid, Bubblegum On My Shoe: FAWM 2010 By The Numbers, A Eulogy For February 2010

2010-02-28T14:46:00.006-05:00

I’ve sort of learned, or at least decided, that being painfully honest about myself is probably the best thing I can do. It’s much better to highlight my weaknesses than to try to hide them. That way, anytime I do something positive, it will be good, and anytime I do something negative, it will just be expected. I think it’s a concept I’ve learned from accounting. Auditors want to portray financial results with a negative spin so any surprises will be positive, and they can’t get sued for making things look better than they actually turned out to be. So anyway, I’ve decided to be very up front about all my flaws because I know I already have a very dedicated set of friends and family who will stick by me no matter how crazy I am. If I do alienate someone, I am sorry, and I know that there are these other wonderful people who will always be there.

So anyway, I think it’s fairly clear that this February I’ve completely lost my mind. Well, sort of. I mean I still feel pretty much the same as normal. It’s just that instead of writing depressing Facebook status updates, I’ve written 50 depressing songs. Anyway, I’ve had this trend of always desperately longing for one particular girl ever since 6th grade. Since 10th grade, I’ve usually waited until I think a girl likes me before I fall for her. Unfortunately, I’m usually wrong, she doesn’t actually like me, and I’m stuck all crazified. And this is a completely constant process, like I haven’t gone a day in like 12 years without this being the case. Anyway, this February (I guess it really started with a song I wrote at the end of January) I’ve channeled that into writing songs. It’s funny because I was worried at the beginning of the month that I would be too busy to write the 14 songs, but I managed to do that 3.5 times over.

Anyway, writing these songs has been really helpful because it helps me get rid of a lot of the self-deprecating nonsense that’s always in my soul, and I actually feel way better than normal in general. It has also helped me get rid of the egotistical self-praise that’s always in my soul. Somehow I always do things in exact opposites, and I always love myself just as much as I hate myself. My eventual goal is to just be normal. Anyway, I’m just writing this to sort of explain myself. I also want to thank people for still being kind and friendly through all the public craziness I engage in. It means the world to me. It’s more than I deserve. I tried to give some of that back when I started writing the weirdo fairy tale songs. I wish I could have made those songs better, but they hopefully show my appreciation for people in my life. I wish all the songs I’ve written could actually be good, unfortunately they’re not. Some of them are ok though, and I’m getting better I think compared to previous years. That’s not really important though, what is important is that they’ve allowed me to exorcise some of the crazy inside. Anyway, here are the numbers:

1 Month
28 Days
50 Songs
2.8 hours of music
1.7857142857142857142857142857143 = Average # of songs per day
1 = Minimum # of songs per day
29 of them are about 1 grrl (Sorry [name withheld for legal reasons], thanks for dealing with it with such grace)
1 of them is about another grrl (Sorry [name withheld for legal reasons], I’m not nearly as bitter at it makes me sound)
1 of them is about the imminent Robot-Zombie Apocalypse
1 romanticizes something I’ve never actually done
1 is about where I’m from
1 of them is about keeping the Dodgers in Brooklyn
2 of them are shamelessly self-deprecating (the rest are shamefully self-deprecating)
50 of them are about how great I think I am
1 of them I wrote so I could have a song with the capo on the 10th fret
1 I just wrote in response to a challenge to write a song from the perspective of an inanimate object
1 is a brief venture into Gospel/MC Hammer ripoff
1 is an attempt to write a weirdo indie song
17 tell a weirdo series of fantasy tales that don’t really make any sense
4 are about my family
13 are about my friends
2 were requests
48 were completely unsolicited
1 is about my favorite alcoholic drink
1 is about one of my least favorite alcoholic drinks
1 is about schoolwork
1 is about death and sort of Johnny Cash
1 is about the mail
4 are about dreams
50 reflect how crazy I am
1 is about a song I wrote a month earlier
Most of them are in the key of C, have the same melody, the same chord progression, and show how little I really know about music…

Anyway, thanks to everyone fer putting up with me,
It's more than I deserve,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #50: "Crazy About Me"

2010-02-28T14:44:00.002-05:00

Crazy About Me

© Sean Nolan 2010

28 days,
50 songs,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #49: "The Suspect Nature Of Reality"

2010-02-28T01:04:00.007-05:00

Last semester I took a comparative literature class so they wouldn't kick me out of the honors program. It was a pretty neat class. Anyway, for the final paper we were supposed to write an actual paper comparing the work of two of the authors we read. Instead, I wrote a short story (I don't know why because I've never written one before and have no reason to think I'd be any good at it, and I'm not), and in it I have three different girls who resemble three of the authors' different characterizations of dreams (Pascal, Goethe, Proust). So I was thinking about this story today, and I wrote this song. I guess I'll throw the story up here too, even though it's probably not worth reading (I did get an A in the class, but I think that's because I was the only one who read all the books and my professor liked me).

The Suspect Nature Of Reality (The Short Story)

For a while now, Sara Bell had been like a dream to Liam.[1] On rare occasions, he actually saw her. Instead of becoming more real, she became even more of a dream. He had loved her with all his heart, but now she served some kind of surreal advisory role for him… Kind of like the Oracle at Delphi… kind of. He would dream of a dinner at which she affirmed his ability to love and his enduring naiveté. This comforted him, because those two qualities defined his ideal self. Well, sometimes they defined his ideal self. It really depended on his mood. He would subsequently wake from the dream only to find that it was not a dream. It had all the trappings of a dream though, because whatever confidence he gained remained in that fleeting dream world.

They had met through friends about an eternity ago. She had pursued him relentlessly, so obviously, she would be the one to break his heart. Liam had found out that things always worked out this way in relationships. If ever he pursued a girl, he ended up bored with her. If ever he tried to spurn a girl’s advances, he would end up in her lawn at two in the morning wildly hoping just to see her face in the window. He wondered why they didn’t teach that in science class.

When Liam dreamed of Isabella, it always seemed so real. She wanted him so much. It was so clear. In Liam’s nightly dreams he fancied himself in love with her. He simply dreamed of another life (his real life) in which he was all alone.[2] He wondered why he would have such awful dreams, but he contented himself with his whirlwind love affair with Isabella. Of course when he actually awoke, he found himself miserable as ever and longing for his utopian dream world. The truth is, he rarely ever talked to Isabella, but every time she said a word to him, he became immediately convinced of her undying love.

Angelina was most certainly real. Liam was decidedly against dreaming about her. Until he woke up sometimes, worrying that he needed to fall asleep in order to be well-rested for the next day, and there she was next to him: soft, warm, and beautiful. He would fall asleep wondering how she got there, and he would always wake up the next day with his arms wrapped lovingly around his pillow.[3]

“I just don’t know how to talk to girls,” Liam said to Sara Bell and her mother at breakfast. They responded with encouraging words about how he had been carrying on a conversation with them for the last half hour. They were right, but they were wrong. It was different.

He had slept in Sara Bell’s sister’s room. Sara Bell was home for a brief visit, and she had called him because they hadn’t seen each other in a long time. He had woken up to his life with Isabella only to fall asleep at dawn next to Angelina. Well, pillow Angelina. He had gotten confused. He couldn’t remember if he was asleep or awake. Which world was the real one? He realized the real world was probably the one where he was most unhappy, so he had actually just woken up in Sara Bell’s sister’s room next to a fake Angelina after dreaming about Isabella, probably, but it got so hard to tell the difference sometimes. Liam would have loved to spend several eternities in this dream world of Sara Bell’s house, but he had things to do.

He had to go to work, and that meant seeing Angelina, real Angelina. Real Angelina was a lot like fake Angelina except that she was completely different. They looked exactly the same, and at the mysterious times between being asleep and awake Liam was sure they were the same person, but they were not. Fake Angelina was a pillow. She was soft, comfortable, agreeable, and just perfect. Real Angelina was a person. People tend to be infinitely worse companions than pillows – except maybe Sara Bell, but only maybe. Liam had trouble remembering whether his memories of her were entirely accurate. He seemed to remember that they fought a lot, but the worst parts are always the easiest parts to forget. Anyway, real Angelina was a person. She was as beautiful as fake Angelina, but infinitely more difficult to deal with. Fake Angelina subscribed to all of his romantic ideals, whereas real Angelina was more interested in the kind of purely physical relationship with which an idealistic fifteen year old Liam had vowed never to become involved, no matter how lonely or desperate he became.

Liam had kept his promise to that young boy, probably because he respected the boy’s integrity. As he was thinking about his younger self, Liam caught sight of Angelina. She really was beautiful, but in their brief conversation, she proved, as she always did, her inferiority to fake Angelina. How many times did he have to tell her that he would be much more interested in going out to dinner than to some juvenile frat party? He left work early feeling ill.

He took a nap and dreamed about Isabella. He went to the café where she worked. She liked his hat, and he told her how his mother had made it for him. She smiled, and he left. It was an odd dream though because nothing odd was happening. He appeared to be in his regular town at a regular time of day doing regular types of things. It probably wasn’t a dream after all, but it gets so hard to tell.

Liam got home and turned on the T.V. Now he was pretty sure he wasn’t dreaming, because he had driven all the way home, and usually in dreams you just sort of magically transport from place to place. He thought to himself that he should have stayed to talk to Isabella more whether it was a dream or not. Sara Bell and her mother were right; he could carry on a conversation fairly well. It always struck him how right Sara Bell seemed about everything after the fact. It was probably one of those magical gifts passed down from mother to daughter that always seem to evade the male gender. He wondered about Sara Bell’s mother and how her mother must have passed that gift on to her. He wondered about his equivalent in Sara Bell’s mother’s life. Would he have talked to Isabella? Well since Isabella was sitting across the room from him right now, he might as well go talk to her. He didn’t want to squander the opportunity twice in one day.

They talked for hours, and Liam was very thankful to Sara Bell for making him feel more confident like she always did. Isabella reminded him a lot of Sara Bell – not physically, but behaviorally. He just hoped that he wouldn’t make the same mistakes again, or other mistakes, or any really. His idealism was beginning to catch up to him, and he suddenly felt old, and mistakes would only hinder him even more. Back when he was nineteen, he was sure he’d be married by now. Isabella tapped him on the shoulder. He had become lost in thought, and she wondered if he’d heard the last thing she had said. Something was wrong; Isabella looked a lot like Angelina. No wait, it was Angelina. He had been talking to Angelina this whole time. How had Angelina gotten into his house?

When he woke up on his couch, clinging tightly to a pillow, Liam realized the T.V. was still on. He had fallen asleep… or woken up… or something… No, he had fallen asleep and now he was awake. He was about ninety-nine percent sure. He could never really be one hundred percent sure, because to believe you are one hundred percent sure about anything is to be a fool. Liam’s experiences with the thin line between dreams and realities always came in waves. He would spend several days in one of these clouds of dreams every few months. It made him wish he was an insomniac. Unfortunately, he always slept soundly. If he couldn’t sleep, then he could be sure that everything was real. Also, all the greatest writers, musicians, and artists seemed to be insomniacs. Liam was no artist of any kind, but he appreciated art and wished he could have something in common with great minds. Then his life might not be so mind-numbingly pedestrian. Not that his life was actually mind-numbingly pedestrian. Sara Bell had always told him how unique he was, and she was always right about everything after the fact, so he knew it was true. He just couldn’t see things from that perspective.

Liam ended up going to that frat party with real Angelina. He would have rather gone with fake Angelina, but she devoted her life to more important things. Ah, fake Angelina, homemaker extraordinaire and champion of 1950s suburbia! Real Angelina was less domestic, but more lively. The way things had been going with him drifting in and out of sleep the past few days, Liam appreciated her vivacity. So he let himself have a good time, but keg stands and beer pong were not the same as long walks and days in bed. When it came time for him to walk Angelina home, he declined her invitation for him to stay over. He preferred to go home to fake Angelina or dream Isabella or someone else – someone with the ability to love.

Liam and Isabella were picking out the wallpaper for their new apartment. He was glad he had finally had the courage to approach her so long ago. He had to thank Sara Bell for that; he’d send her some flowers or something. They wanted some kind of vertical striped pattern, but they couldn’t decide whether it should have flowers as well. This was the kind of argument Liam had always wanted to have – one where the outcome didn’t really matter, one you only have when you love someone enough that there’s nothing more important to argue about. Who knew true love could be so easily defined by wallpaper? There was some kind of hammering going on outside, probably construction. They finally decided to steer away from the floral pattern and go with a modest striped pattern. Liam hoped everything would be this easy… Well except for the hammering, he was going to have to say something about it because he couldn’t concentrate, and the walls were starting to melt, and the lights were going dim, and he couldn’t move because Angelina was in the way. Real Angelina? No, fake Angelina. He had been dreaming again, but the hammering was real.

Liam wondered to himself why, out of all the different elements of his dream, it had to be the hammering that was real. Couldn’t he trade the hammering for Isabella, or even wallpaper? Wouldn’t everyone be happier that way? He was hung over, and he felt terrible. He knew this was going to be one of those days where he wallowed in self-pity, despite the fact that he had just about everything you could ever want – a job, a loving family, intelligence, friends, and all the rest. That only made him more depressed because he felt bad for feeling depressed when he knew he had everything, but he was sure it was going to be one of those days, as sure as he was about pursuit, boredom, and heartbreak in relationships.

He remembered back to his idealistic youth when he used to be contrarian just for the sake of being contrarian. He had enjoyed being ironic, but he couldn’t really remember why. The harder he tried to think about it, the more the source of his former joy faded away. On a day like this, however, when he was already feeling nostalgic, he decided to indulge in some of his former contrarian behavior – against himself. This would not be one of those days where he wallowed in self-pity, and maybe pursuit didn’t always lead to boredom in relationships. He went to the café, for real.

On the way to the café one of his favorite songs came on – “Meadowlake Street” by Ryan Adams, and he was sure the lyric “if loving you is a dream that’s not worth having, then why do I dream of you?” was some sort of good omen. He had always been superstitious despite the fact that all the things that were supposedly superstitions never seemed to have any real effect on his life. He also had little reason to believe the lyric boded well for his encounter with Isabella, but somehow he was convinced he would be able to succeed where Mr. Adams had failed. He would take what had always been a dream and turn it into reality. He would make sure his dreams of Isabella had been worth having.

So he asked her out on a date, and she said yes, and she was nothing like his dreams, but that was okay. She was better really. She was real, in the same way that real Angelina was real, but Isabella was a lot more romantic than Angelina. He had to put his happiness with Isabella in perspective though, which meant he needed to see Sara Bell. She always had this way of validating or invalidating major decisions in Liam’s life. He knew that if he could get Sara Bell’s approval, he had a good chance of actually being successful.

He flew all the way across the country, to California, where Sara Bell had taken up painting landscapes, at least for now. It was good to see her. There was something else as well. The usual haze that had come with seeing her since they had broken up wasn’t there. Everything was clear, and he was sure it was real, not a dream.

“Liam, you could be happy with anyone. You’re one of the most loving, genuine people I’ve ever met. In fact, sometimes you can be too loving, and that’s what got you into trouble with me. I know you, and I know you’ve never really taken a risk to approach a girl before. If this girl really means that much to you, that you would finally let your guard down, then I’m sure you have a good chance at happiness. That’s not to say things won’t go wrong, but it’s a good sign. You’re always so worried about how other people feel that you usually forget about yourself, but you don’t realize that when you’re in love, the other person has to care about you, which means there has to be a you there, which means you have to be at least a little selfish sometimes. So I think it’s great that you finally decided to take a risk. You won’t regret it, no matter what happens. You’re a good kid, and you have a great ability to make the people around you happy.”

Sara Bell had made him feel even better. She was right, as always. He hoped everything worked out with Isabella, but he knew that even if it didn’t he had broken an important barrier in his life. He still had his ability to love, but he thought that maybe he had overcome his enduring naiveté. It probably was time for him to grow up and start taking risks. He flew back home feeling very content, but walking home, he saw Angelina. He hadn’t thought much of her since that frat party. She was walking arm-in-arm with another man. It turned out she had fallen in love. It was so bizarre; he knew it had to be true. Nothing like that could happen in a dream, only in the real world do such crazy things ever happen. That made him happy. He gained a lot of respect for Angelina, and he felt a lot better about the times they’d spent together. Maybe she had actually cared about him after all. Even if she hadn’t cared about him, at least she cared about this other guy. Liam always appreciated it when people cared about other people.

He went out with Isabella that night. They went to a bar, and Isabella got a little too drunk to drive home. Liam invited her over, and she accepted. On the walk home, however, Liam had a sudden striking thought: he hoped Isabella wouldn’t mind sharing the bed with fake Angelina.

[1] Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, The Sorrows of Young Werther, trans. Elizabeth Mayer and Louise Bogan (New York: Vintage Classics, 1990), 11-12.

[2] Blaise Pascal, Selected “Pensees” and Provincial Letters: A Dual-Language Book, trans. Stanley Appelbaum (Mineola, New York: Dover Publications, Inc., 2004), 207.

[3] Marcel Proust, Swann’s Way, trans. Lydia Davis (New York: Penguin Books, 2004), 3-9. Especially, pages 4-5.

The Suspect Nature Of Reality (The Song)

© Sean Nolan 2010

All is vanity,
Shut up, tiny robot doctor,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #48: "Drunken Cowboy Serenade"

2010-02-27T13:05:00.003-05:00

This is sort of a follow-up to Drunken Cowgirl Serenade which I wrote back in January...

Drunken Cowboy Serenade

© Sean Nolan 2010

Drunken Robot Serenade,
Shut up, tiny robot drunkie,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #47: "Waking Up From A Sadie Hawkins Dream"

2010-02-26T21:48:00.002-05:00

Waking Up From A Sadie Hawkins Dream

© Sean Nolan 2010

Will you confuse my love for the Cobwebs,
Get lost on Strawberry Wine,
Owl City is way better than you think,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #46: "The Baker"

2010-02-26T16:39:00.002-05:00

Seanye Warhol Reunites With An Old Friend

After Seanye Warhol left the gardener's farm, he followed the map onwards. He thought he recognized a smell though, something he hadn't smelled since he was a child: the sweet smell of a bakery. He looked around and saw the small bakery in the distance. He hoped it was owned by who he thought. When Seanye Warhol had still been living in the castle back home, his favorite person there was the baker. She was always kind to Seanye, and she always made him wonderful desserts whenever he was feeling upset. When Seanye got kicked out of the castle on his eighth birthday, the baker was the only person who stood up for him. She too was kicked out of the castle and banished from the land. Initially, Seanye would still venture into the Beyond Land to visit her. She was kind as ever even though she was now poor, and she played a big part in raising him from a spoiled prince into a genuine person.

So Seanye Warhol hoped this bakery belonged to his old friend. When he knocked on the door, he immediately recognized his old baker. He explained to her about his long journey and told her how much he'd missed her and how much she had helped him on his journey without knowing it. They talked about his childhood for a while, and she made him some of the desserts she had once made him as a boy. He was glad that she had finally found somewhere to continue her love of baking. He stayed the night and left in the morning, thanking her again for all she'd done for him...

The Baker

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Elise,
Yer very much responsible for who I am today, thanks,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #45: "The Gardener"

2010-02-26T15:39:00.001-05:00

Seanye Warhol Begins His Journey Home And Comes To Appreciate The Earth

With his new map in hand, Seanye Warhol began the journey home. Soon after he began, he came upon a woman tending to a garden. She offered him some vegetables, but he politely declined. He asked her why, with all the adventure to be had in the world, she stayed here on her small farm, tending to her garden. She responded that she had been here ever since she was a child, and it was the thing she enjoyed most in the world.

He asked her if she had ever done any traveling. She responded that she had indeed seen the world, and it was a very lovely place. She also said, however, that all the sites in the world could never compare to the satisfaction from having a connection with the Earth. Seanye Warhol thought back to how much Mother Earth had helped him and realized the gardener might be right after all. He asked her what it was about gardening that she enjoyed so much. She said she couldn't really put it into words other than to say that there was a lot of beauty in it all. Seanye thought about that for a while, wished her well, and continued on his journey home...

The Gardener

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Kathryn,
Vegetables are gross, purple unicorns are way better,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #44: "Mail-Order Angels"

2010-02-25T18:42:00.002-05:00

Mail-Order Angels

© Sean Nolan 2010

Shut up, tiny robot doctor,
Will you confuse my love for tiny robot doctor,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #43: "A Sadie Hawkins Dream"

2010-02-25T12:23:00.006-05:00

A Sadie Hawkins Dream

© Sean Nolan 2010

Look at me, I'm crazy,
Robot-Zombie Apocalypse,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #42: "The Other Side Of The Earth II: Mother Earth"

2010-02-24T18:40:00.004-05:00

Seanye Warhol Gets A Map Home From Mother Earth On The Other Side Of The Earth

After Seanye Warhol departed from Father Time, he proceeded deeper into the strangely colored woods on The Other Side Of The Earth. He followed a similar golden glow that had led him to Father Time. When he came to Mother Earth, she instantly put her arm around him comfortingly. She already knew what he needed. He begged her to help him find a way back home. He even asked her to lie to him and tell him he could make it, and as long as he thought he'd be successful, he wouldn't mind dying along the way.

Mother Earth told Seanye Warhol to calm down. Things were not quite as dire as he made them seem. Father Time had already agreed to stop time, so all Seanye needed was directions. Mother Earth gave him a map back home, but cautioned that the journey back would be no easier than his journey to this point. With that, Seanye Warhol suddenly woke up under the tree. All the colors were back to normal. He though it must've just been a dream, but when he reached inside his coat, he found the map that Mother Earth had given him. He quickly consulted the map, and started his journey home. He didn't care if the people didn't want him back because he had helped the Kappablue escape. He knew the killings were due to the evil android zombies, and he would have to defeat them...

The Other Side Of The Earth II: Mother Earth

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Mom,
Thanks for who I am,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #41: "The Other Side Of The Earth I: Father Time"

2010-02-24T18:05:00.001-05:00

Seanye Warhol Gets Transported To The Other Side Of The World Where He Converses With Father Time

After leaving the town with the infinite stairwell, Seanye Warhol suddenly realized he had no idea how long he had been away from home. He was sad to miss his one true love, and he just wanted to be home. He had no idea where he was going. He wished he hadn't been exiled, and he hadn't found anything to make him think he could ever be welcomed back to his village. In a state of utter defeat, he sat down by a tree and fell asleep. When he awoke, he found that he was in some other place. It was different. It looked sort of like the forest he had been in, but all the colors were different, and he saw a bright light shining nearby. He decided to go to the light to figure out what it was. There was a man standing in a clearing surrounded by a bright golden glow. Seanye Warhol asked the man where he was. The man responded that he was on The Other Side Of The Earth. Confused, Seanye asked the man who he was. The man responded that he was Father Time.

Seanye Warhol figured that Father Time might have some answers for him. He asked if he might ever get back home. Father Time said he could not tell that, he only knew things about time. Seanye then asked how long it would take him to get back home from where he was. Father Time ventured a guess that it would take about 50 years. Seanye Warhol realized that he would be old or dead by that time and implored Father Time to stop time so that he could make it back home to his sweetheart once again. Father Time said that he could try, but first Seanye Warhol would have to figure out how to get back home. To do that, he would have to visit Mother Earth. Feeling that Father Time could give him the time to get home, Seanye Warhol headed off in search of Mother Earth...

The Other Side Of The Earth I: Father Time

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Dad,
Thanks for who I am,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #40: "Oh God, Wait Till You Hear This Joke!/Goodbye Baby"

2010-02-23T22:59:00.008-05:00

Sorry for the bad werds again!!!! Warning: It's long and sad!!!!!!!!!!

Oh God, Wait Till You Hear This Joke!/Goodbye Baby

© Sean Nolan 2010

Oh goodness,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #39: "An Old Man Tries To Conquer Time By Taking A Lesson From The Ancient Egyptians"

2010-02-23T21:04:00.004-05:00

An Old Man Tries To Conquer Time By Taking A Lesson From The Ancient Egyptians

© Sean Nolan 2010

Shut up, tiny robot doctor,
My heart is dead,
Two hands Ginobili,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #38: "The Runner On The Infinite Stairwell"

2010-02-22T23:20:00.002-05:00

Seanye Warhol Learns About The Treasures Atop The Infinite Stairwell

After Seanye Warhol left the astronomer's tower, he headed into the next town over. This town too had an interesting tall landmark right in the middle. It was a giant stairwell that looked like it went on forever. He came up to the stairwell and he saw a man on it. He was running, but it looked like he wasn't getting anywhere. He was running very fast in fact, and it didn't make any sense that he wasn't making any progress.

Seanye Warhol asked the man what he was doing and why he wasn't getting anywhere. Without stopping his running, the man answered that he was trying to climb this stairwell. It was no ordinary stairwell though. It was known as the Infinite Stairwell, and legend had it that if a man were to ever reach the top, he would meet the girl of his dreams. Many had tried, but everyone that did never made it anywhere. Seanye Warhol asked the man why he even tried. The man said that he had trained to run since his youth, and that his desire for the girl of his dreams was so strong that he would do what it took to reach the top. He would never give up. Seanye marveled at the man's resolve and wished him well. As he walked away, Seanye noticed that the man had indeed made the smallest amount of progress since they began to talk... Maybe he would one day reach the top after all...

The Runner On The Infinite Stairwell

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Matt,
Yer the best runner I know, so get to the top fer all of us,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #37: "The Astronomer"

2010-02-21T23:15:00.001-05:00

Seanye Warhol Meets The Astronomer And His Wife

After leaving the secret underground chipmunk school behind, Seanye Warhol continued on his journey. He soon came to a small town. The most interesting thing about the town was the tall tower right in the middle. When he looked closer, Seanye Warhol saw a telescope sticking out the top of the tower; it was an observatory. He asked a passerby about the giant tower, and she told him how the tower belonged to the local astronomer. She said he was a very quiet and unfriendly man. He kept to himself, only thinking of the stars. Anything he said seemed rude or condescending.

Seanye Warhol was surprised that something as beautiful as the heavens could inspire a man to be so cruel and unfriendly. He went to the tower to meet the astronomer. The astronomer answered the door, and he did seem fairly rude and unwelcoming, but Seanye heard a gentle female voice welcome him in. Seanye Warhol spent the afternoon with the astronomer and his wife and soon learned that the astronomer was actually a very kind and caring man. He loved his wife dearly, and he only seemed irritable and aloof because his study of the heavens required intense thought and concentration, and when he was not thinking about the stars, he was thinking about his wife. There was simply too much in his head. Seanye Warhol asked to see the astronomer's telescope, and the astronomer obliged him. The night sky was truly beautiful. Seanye headed on from the astronomer's tower feeling much better than when he had entered it...

The Astronomer

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Joey,
Yer a good kid,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #36: "I ♥ Pretty Grrls Way More Than I ♥ Croatia Trying To Get Into The E.U."

2010-02-21T21:12:00.003-05:00

I should really be doing homework right now, but I compromised and didn't write a fairy tale song, because it takes way longer to write out the backstory...

I ♥ Pretty Grrls Way More Than I ♥ Croatia Trying To Get Into The E.U.

© Sean Nolan 2010

Shut up, Tiny Robot Doctor,
Oh God, I've lost my mind,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #35: "Sean Nolan Writes Another Song About A Grrl, Or All The Beer In Athens Just Ain't Enough"

2010-02-20T23:18:00.004-05:00

I took a brief break from my fantasy series to make room for a little more self-loathing, but kind of the happy sort of self-loathing where the zombies aren't that fast and the robots get all rusty and the werewolves are intellectuals and stuff and Star Wars is always on TV.

Sean Nolan Writes Another Song About A Grrl, Or All The Beer In Athens Just Ain't Enough

© Sean Nolan 2010

Also, my little sister Fiona is amazing. She drew me this gorgeous picture, and I love her to death.
Make lurv like rock 'n' roll,
Keep the Dodgers in Brooklyn,
Will you confuse my love for the Cobwebs,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #34: "The Captain Bows Her Head, Removes Her Hat, And Her Crew Shed A Tear"

2010-02-20T03:50:00.002-05:00

Follow up to "My Captain, Queen Of The Sea."

The Captain Bows Her Head, Removes Her Hat, And Her Crew Shed A Tear

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Nikki,
Forevziez our Captain,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #33: "Ms. Harriet Chimpunk's Underground School Fer Young Chipmunks"

2010-02-19T15:18:00.002-05:00

Seanye Warhol Discovers A School For Chipmunks In The Forest

After Seanye Warhol parted the adorable Hartz, he headed into the woods. He soon came upon a group of chipmunks, but these weren't any ordinary chipmunks. It was a chipmunk school in the middle of the woods. There were several young chipmunks gathered around a couple of older chipmunks who appeared to be teaching them. When they saw Seanye Warhol approached, they asked him how he was and invited him to listen in on the rest of their lesson. It was a lesson about the history of chipmunks in this forest. It detailed the rise to power of the evil weasels.

After the lecture was over, Ms. Harriet Chipmunk came over to Seanye Warhol and explained to him that she and her friend Mr. Finnius P. Chipmunk had set up a secret underground school to teach the young chipmunks about the history of chipmunks. Seanye asked why the school had to be underground, and Ms. Chipmunk explained that the evil weasels had outlawed any education of chipmunks fearing they might try to revolt. Any school was banned, and the punishment for teaching was death. Seanye asked the chipmunks why they were risking so much to teach, and Ms. Chipmunk explained that if the youths ever wanted to have anything for themselves, they needed to learn. So she set up the school in order to educate the younger generation with the hope that one day the chipmunks would be able to overthrow the chipmunks and have wealth for themselves. Seanye Warhol feared for the chipmunks, but knew their cause was a just one. He promised to keep a watch out for weasels to secure the safety of the school and continued onwards...

Ms. Harriet Chipmunk's Underground School Fer Young Chipmunks

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Ashley and Blake,
Thanks fer sacrificing to teach the yungins,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #32: "Hartz vs. Hunters"

2010-02-18T22:50:00.001-05:00

I think all these songs are killing my voice... And my brain...

Seanye Warhol Discovers The Adorable Hartz

After Seanye Warhol headed away from the valley kingdom, he followed the river all the way to an ocean. Seanye was relieved to see the coast free from pirates. He did, however, see a bunch of small adorable creatures running around. They looked kind of like beavers, but smaller and rounder and without the big tails. They kept jumping and splashing around in the sea. One of them stopped in front of him, and Seanye Warhol was surprised when it started talking to him.

"Yer not a hunter, are you?" the creature asked. Seanye said no, he wasn't. He would never harm a living creature, and he recounted his encounter with the Kappablue. The creature was convinced that Seanye Warhol was not a hunter, and it explained that they were Hartz. They were aquatic mammals that had gained the ability to breathe underwater for as long as they chose. They chose mates at a very young age and developed lifelong bonds of love that were never broken. They were completely adorable, and loved nothing more than to swim around and play. They used to live on land, but they were hunted ruthlessly by men who prized Hart pelts. The Hartz used their ability to breathe underwater to start building homes under the ocean where the hunters could not reach them. Now they only came to the shore to harass any hunters that still tried to catch them. Seanye Warhol was glad the Hartz were able to escape the hunters, but hoped that one day they would be able to live above the water again. He wished the Hartz well and said that he would look out for any hunters in the area...

Hartz vs. Hunters

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Keri and Mike,
Keep being adorable,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #31: "Cassandra"

2010-02-18T21:38:00.002-05:00

Seanye Warhol Tries To Warn The Kingdom Of The Approaching Storm

After Seanye Warhol parted from the loving family, he came upon a kingdom in a valley beyond the forest. Everything seemed normal, but he heard a woman crying in the distance. He went to see what the trouble was and found the woman sobbing on the floor. He asked her why she was crying, and she said it was because her whole town was about to be flooded, and no one would leave. He said that she should go tell everyone to evacuate immediately, but she told him that they never believed anything she said.

She was the daughter of the king, but she had been exiled when prophets said that she would bring ruin to the town. Seanye Warhol sympathized with her because he too knew what it was like to be exiled royalty. Apparently, the prophets had conspired against her because if she was out of the picture, they would surely gain power after the king died. So though the girl actually had much stronger prophetic powers than any of the royal prophets, she was exiled. One day, she foresaw the coming of a great storm that would flood the valley and destroy the kingdom. She tried to warn the citizens, but no one believed her. The storm was drawing near, and she was sad that all her people would soon be dead. Seanye Warhol promised that he would go tell the people of the village, saying he was a prophet from far off who had been sent great lengths to warn them. Perhaps they might believe him and evacuate. After the flood, they would have to believe the prophetess again and restore her to her rightful throne. Seanye did tell the people of the town, and some of them did believe him, but others still believed in the evil, power-hungry prophets and stayed behind. Seanye hoped that the prophetess would one day become queen, but he knew he had to carry on to avoid the flood and venture in search of his dreams...

Cassandra

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Katie,
I'll try to listen to you more, big sister,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #30: "A Family In Search Of The Fountain Of Youth"

2010-02-18T20:44:00.003-05:00

Seanye Warhol Learns About The Fountain Of Youth

After parting the great fairy party, Seanye Warhol headed into the woods. He traveled for a while before he started to hear voices. He eventually came upon a family traveling through the woods: a woman, her husband, and their daughter. By this point, Seanye was no stranger to travel, but he wondered what might bring a whole family as far as he had come. When he asked, they said they were looking for the Fountain of Youth.

According to them, they were getting very close. They seemed like a normal and loving family, so Seanye Warhol asked them why they might be seeking the Fountain of Youth. They explained that it was not because they feared death or the troubles of age, but that they couldn't bear the though of ever being apart. They treasured their youth and wanted to make sure that they could maintain their love for each other throughout the ages. Their rough journey and all their troubles had brought them even closer together, and they were determined now more than ever to find the Fountain. Seanye could see they were tired and hungry, so he gave them his pouch of fairy dust thinking that they might need it if they were ever to find the fountain. He wished them well and headed deeper into the forest...

A Family In Search Of The Fountain Of Youth

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Aimee,
May you find the Fountain of Youth for all our sakes,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #29: "The Great Fairy Dust Shortage"

2010-02-18T19:51:00.003-05:00

Seanye Warhol Happens Upon A Great Fairy Celebration

Seanye Warhol sat in his boat and drifted off to sleep as he floated gently down the stream. When he awoke, his boat had drifted into a small lake. Looking around where his boat had drifted ashore he saw what appeared to be a party with no one in attendance. There were bright lights all around, but no one was there. Then he realized that the lights weren't any regular lights, they were actually tiny fairies. He appeared to be right in the middle of a huge fairy party. He cleared his throat and asked one of the nearby fairies why they were celebrating so much. The fairy explained that they were celebrating the one year anniversary of the time they had been saved from near extinction by one of the bravest fairies in fairy history.

Seanye Warhol asked to see this brave fairy so he could hear her story. Her heart was so kind that even on this day to celebrate her, she took the time to tell her story to a stranger. About a year ago, the town of fairies had come very close to running out of fairy dust, the magical substance that allows fairies to fly and keeps their hearts alive and powered with pure joy and goodness. The fairies were all sure they were done for, but the one brave fairy decided she would travel to the ends of the earth to find more fairy dust. She traveled farther than any fairy had before, but she still could not find any dust. She grew tired and lay down on the ground, thinking she would die right there, but suddenly she felt strong. She looked up to see fairy dust falling from the tree above. She had found the mythical Ancient Fairy Dust Tree from which all fairy dust came. She carried as much fairy dust as she could back to her home and told them about the tree. She had saved her people from destruction, and they would forever celebrate her bravery. Seanye Warhol stayed at the party for a while, but knew that he had to move on. He thanked the fairies for their kindness, and the brave fairy gave him a pouch of fairy dust to use should he ever need it...

The Great Fairy Dust Shortage

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Rachel,
Keep on helping all the less fortunate fairies in the world,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #28: "Unicorns With All Yer Horns"

2010-02-17T18:27:00.001-05:00

Seanye Warhol Meets The Artistic Unicorn Sisters

As Seanye Warhol left the seaside, he began to get very tired and sad. He remembered his sweetheart back in his home kingdom and missed her more than ever. He saw a small boat sitting in a creek and decided to get in to give his legs a rest. He started rowing up the stream into a forest. He was in the Land of Unicorns now.

He grew tired of rowing and tied the boat to a tree. In a small clearing, he saw two unicorns. These weren't just any unicorns, they were the most beautiful unicorns he had ever seen. In addition, they were making some of the most beautiful art he'd ever seen. Using their horns, they were drawing pictures in midair of beautiful colorful landscapes. The art was breathtaking, and Seanye Warhol decided to approach them. They were very kind. He explained his situation and expressed his heartbreak. They encouraged him and said that they too had troubles, but they had learned that any trouble can be overcome in time. Seanye wasn't convinced and though they were just playing mindgames with him, but they explained their point. The two unicorns were sisters. The younger unicorn had always been teased because she was different. Her mane was blue instead of silver like all the other unicorns. Everyone else told her she should just dye her mane, but the younger unicorn appreciated her individuality and had crafted her own unique personality that made her a very special unicorn indeed. The older unicorn sister was sad because she felt constant pressure to become an internationally acclaimed unicorn horn artist. Her talent had been recognized at a young age, but it still took a lot of work to develop her talent. She had learned, however, that all the hard work paid off when she created something beautiful and persistent in her art. After the tales of encouragement, Seanye Warhol felt better about himself. He felt empowered to continue on his journey and achieve his dreams...

Unicorns With All Yer Horns

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Fiona and Siobhan,
Keep being awesome,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #27: "My Cap'n, Queen Of The Sea"

2010-02-17T17:11:00.003-05:00

Seanye Warhol Avoids Being Recruited By The Gang Of Pirates

After Seanye Warhol departed the kingdom of Sterbaville, he came upon a large body of water... Probably a sea, he guessed. He saw a ship on the water's edge. Not seeing any other way to go, Seanye approached one of the men loading cargo onto the ship and asked to speak to the captain. "The Cap'n?" replied the man, "Nobody talks to Miss Cap'n." "Miss Cap'n?" Seanye asked. The man replied telling the story of their captain, the only female pirate captain in the land. Ever since childhood, the captain had dreamed of being a pirate, but no one took her seriously. She had to prove herself. So she started small, conducting raids on local tax collectors and merchants then buying rounds at the local bars for other pirate groups. She gradually gained a loyal band of followers who claimed she was the toughest captain in the land. She had lost both of her legs, one of her eyes, and survived every disease the high seas could throw at her.

But there was something more. Pirates will follow any captain when the times are good, but this captain had a way of keeping her pirates loyal even when times were dire. Any new recruit to her gang usually fell deep in love with the captain, she lured them to her cabin where she removed their hearts and kept them stored in a safe in her quarters. This assured that no pirate could ever leave her ship alive. Fearing being taken by this ravenous gang of pirate and knowing that his heart belonged to a sweet girl back in his home kingdom, Seanye Warhol made an excuse to leave and ran to safety, heading along the shore into the Land of Unicorns...

My Cap'n, Queen Of The Sea

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Nikki,
Please be healthy in all ye quests,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #26: "The Great Ladder Fiasco"

2010-02-17T16:10:00.003-05:00

Seanye Warhol Commiserates With The Laddermaker From Sterbaville

After he parted from good King Litebrite, Seanye Warhol continued into the smaller kingdom of Sterbaville. He instantly noticed that the ground was completely littered with ladders of different sizes. Most of them were very tall, and all of them were very beautiful. They were built by hand with beautiful carvings running their length. Straight through the middle of town, there was one ladder taller than all the rest. It looked like it could probably reach the moon. The citizens of Sterbaville seemed unaware of the ladder and just kept tripping over them as the walked by. When he asked someone about the ladders, they did not speak, they simply pointed to a small cottage on the edge of town.

When Seanye Warhol approached the cottage, he was a man outside sitting on the ground, talking to himself. Seanye asked the man who he was, and it turned out he was the laddermaker of the town. When Seanye Warhol asked about the ladders all over town, the laddermaker warned that his tale was long and heartbreaking, but Seanye was curious and used to heartbreak.

The laddermaker explained how he had once been very happy. He had a grrl he loved, and he had been honored to build a ladder to the top of the tallest tower in the king's castle. After the success of this project, he decided to build a ladder to the bottom of the deepest gorge when the evil dragons lived. The laddermaker hoped that this gesture of peace would ease tensions with the dragons and bring about harmony. The town was initially very supportive of the laddermaker. The dragons, however, cared nothing for peace. They viewed the ladder as an invasion of their privacy and vowed to seek revenge on the laddermaker. One day, they stole his grrl, who he was set to marry the next June, and put her on the moon. The laddermaker was heartbroken, but his resolve was strong. He was determined to build a ladder to the moon. Initially everyone supported him because they had loved the young couple. However, all of his attempts kept failing. He would build the ladders very high, sometimes halfway to the moon, and they would break in half. His next idea was to build a series of smaller ladders, tie them together on the ground until they were tall enough, then pull the ladder up so that it reached the moon. By this point, however, the townspeople though the laddermaker had gone crazy and no longer wished to help him. He was sure the ladder would work, but without help, he could not pull it upright. So now the kingdom of Sterbaville was littered with ladders and populated by a bevy of disinterested citizens and one heartbroken laddermaker. Seanye Warhol vowed that in his journeys, he would search for good-hearted people to come help the laddermaker finally reunite with his one true love. Seanye Warhol wished the laddermaker well and continued on his journey...

The Great Ladder Fiasco

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Sean G.,
Build a ladder to the moon,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #25: "King Eikalid Takes All The Brites Out Of All The Lites (A Tale Of Expropration)"

2010-02-17T00:07:00.002-05:00

Seanye Warhol Meets King Litebrite And Hears His Tale

After parting ways with the Kappablue, Seanye Warhol headed into the Beyond Land. He knew the first kingdom he would happen upon was the friendly kingdom of good King Litebrite. He had heard tales of King Litebrite's good deeds and looked forward to meeting him, but as he approached the kingdom, things looked strange. The Kingdom of Litebrite was known for its wonderful, colorful, bright lights. They were all over all the buildings, along all the streets, everywhere. But all Seanye Warhol could see was darkness. Being wary of this darkness, he headed towards a group of men on horseback far outside of town, all carrying the brightest lights of silver and gold. As he approached, he could see that the silver and gold lights were emanating from their armor. Among them, he recognized the face of King Litebrite.

Seanye Warhol asked King Litebrite to explain how things had gotten this way. King Litebrite explained how the evil King Eikalid had somehow managed to take all the brites out of all the lites in the kingdom, leaving the whole kingdom in darkness. Unable to deal with all the darkness, the Litebriteite men were forced from their homes and banished farther into the Beyond Land. King Litebrite, however, wasn't about to let King Eikalid get away with this. He had planned a final charge to take back his kingdom. He cautioned Seanye Warhol, as he was unarmed, to pass on. Seanye Warhol wanted to hlep, but King Litebrite said that this was not his battle. Seanye asked how he could help, and King Litebrite only said, "Just wish us well." Seanye Warhol did wish them well, and carried on his journey, farther into the Beyond Land...

King Eikalid Takes All The Brites Out Of All The Lites (A Tale Of Expropration)

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Drew,
Onward in yer quest to retake the Kingdom of Litebrite,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #24: "Kappablue (I'm Telling You)

2010-02-16T23:11:00.005-05:00

I've decided I should probably write songs about things other than girls. I've decided to write song about my friends. Except they will be part of a fantasy concept that doesn't make any sense and is completely weird. The songs will probably also not be very good. Anyway, this is the first in the series. Each song will also have a narrative that will give the back story to the song. For now I am calling this loose concept "The Adventures Of Seanye Warhol In The Beyond Land."

Seanye Warhol Decides Not To Slay The Kappablue

Once upon a time, millions of years ago, Kappablues roamed the lands around Athens, Georgia. The Kappablue is a magical creature. It looks like a two-headed cougar with beautiful blue wings and two horns growing out of each head. Kappablues are known for their gentle and encouraging nature. People say that all the Kappablues died out before the dinosaurs, but there have been Kappablue sightings in the Athens area for centuries.

Seanye Warhol was on his last legs and feeling quite depressed. He was born a prince of the land, but a series of unfortunate mistakes on his eighth birthday caused him to be banished from the castle and raised by a peasant family. He worked hard though, and got a job as a squire, but he always seemed to do everything wrong. The king sent him on one final assignment. If he failed, he would be banished from the kingdom forever. A Kappablue had been sighted outside the kingdom. The villagers blamed it for several mysterious deaths (which were actually perpetrated by a gang of ravenous, intelligent android zombies; we all know that Kappablues are gentle by nature and would never harm a soul). So Seanye Warhol was charged with slaying the gentle Kappablue.

Seanye Warhol had no interest in slaying much of anything, but he also had little interest in being banished from the kingdom. He went out, sword in hand, to slay the Kappablue. When we met the creature, however, he could tell it was innocent. They started conversing and soon became good friends. The conversation soon turned to Seanye Warhol's many insecurities. He felt that he was to blame for all the tragedies in his life. The Kappablue assured him that he was honest, noble, and good. The Kappablue said he should try to reclaim his place in the royal family. Seanye Warhol appreciated the sentiment, but was not quite convinced. He soon realized the kingdom was not for him and that he could not slay the Kappablue; he would have to journey into the Beyond Land. He warned the Kappablue of the royal death sentence and told it to flee. The Kappablue promised to flee only if Seanye Warhol took to heart its encouragement. He promised he would, and they headed off in separate directions...

Kappablue (I'm Telling You)

© Sean Nolan 2010

To Virginia and Amy,
I'm a weirdo,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #23: Wishes And Fishes

2010-02-15T21:08:00.003-05:00

I'm not really all that crazy about this one... Oops!!

Wishes And Fishes

© Sean Nolan 2010

Wishes and fishes,
And grrls with curls,
Keep the Dodgers in Brooklyn,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #22: Juliet Sometimes

2010-02-15T14:33:00.003-05:00

This was my response to a challenge to write a song that had chords that were neither major nor minor...

Juliet Sometimes

© Sean Nolan 2010

My heart is forever filled with hope and tiny robots,
Will you confuse my love for the Cobwebs,
Two hands Ginobili,
Bunny ain't no kind of rider,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

of Montreal

2010-02-14T23:16:00.004-05:00

I have recently become completely obsessed with of Montreal. Naturally, I've bought all of their records (well except for a few compilation albums...). I don't really have the money to afford them, but I still did it anyway. One day I am going to die broke in a ditch alone. Anyway, they're really good. And they're from Athens... Which is where I live!!! I saw them live because thankfully Kappa and Blue sometimes force me to hang out with them, which is nice. Anyway, of Montreal is the best. For a while they were like indie-Beatles. Now they're more like weirdo-disco. It's all great and makes my heart feel warm. They're kinda like Dr. Pepper or big furry pink robotz or something equally as amazing. Please listen to them because chances are you live or have lived in Athens at some point too. Also, you prbly want a warm heart too. My favorite songs right now are prbly "Plastis Wafer," "Id Engager," "A Sentence Of Sorts In Kongsvinger," "Bunny Ain't No Kind Of Rider," "She's A Rejecter," and "Every Day Feels Like Sunday." (Why only from the last three albums you ask" I thought you had all of them... Well, yes, but I've had the last three for about a week, and I've only listened to the other ones once each). Anyway, my main point is: Athens. Listen to music.

Also, buy records, like Hissing Fauna, Are You The Destroyer? by of Montreal,
Will you confuse my Georgia for Greece,
Keep the robots in the Matrix,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #21: I'm Perpetually A F*cking Teenager (Sara Bell)

2010-02-14T21:09:00.003-05:00

Happy Valentime!!

I'm Perpetually A Fucking Teenager (Sara Bell)

© Sean Nolan 2010

Will you confuse my werewolves fer zombies,
My heart is dead,
Keep the Dodgers in Brooklyn,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #20: Faced With The Possibility Of Death For The First Time In His Life, Young Eli Compiles A Cursory List Of His Favorite Things...

2010-02-13T16:45:00.003-05:00

I think I'm finally running out of songs to write...

Faced With The Possibility Of Death For The First Time In His Life, Young Eli Compiles A Cursory List Of His Favorite Things About His One True Love

© Sean Nolan

Happy Valentine's Eve,
My heart is dead,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #19: That Sheriff's Got A Cold Black Heart And He'll Shoot Me To Death

2010-02-12T16:27:00.003-05:00

It was snowing, so I wrote this

That Sheriff's Got A Cold Black Heart And He'll Shoot Me To Death

© Sean Nolan 2010

Will you confuse my robots for some other robots,
Keep the Robots in Robotville,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #18: Phoenix (A Pre-Post-Apocalyptic Tale)

2010-02-11T22:28:00.003-05:00

This was my attempt to write a weirdo indie song. I'm not sure if that's the kind of thing I do best. Mostly I just write songs about grrlz.

Phoenix (A Pre-Post-Apocalyptic Tale)

© Sean Nolan 2010

Will you confuse my hugz fer the Zombiez,
Two robots Ginobili,
Keep the Werewolves in London,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #17: Chances Are I'm In Love With You

2010-02-11T15:29:00.001-05:00

Chances Are I'm In Love With You

© Sean Nolan 2010

Keep the Dodgers in Brooklyn,
Two hands Ginobili,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #16: (You Gotta) Pray

2010-02-10T21:28:00.003-05:00

I figured I'd try my hand at writing a Gospel song...

(You Gotta) Pray

© Sean Nolan 2010

Shut up, tiny robot doctor,
Will you confuse my love for the Robots,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #15: Kid, I Only Wrote All Those Songs Fer You So You'd Sleep With Me

2010-02-09T22:55:00.003-05:00

Kid, I Only Wrote You All Those Songs Fer You So You'd Sleep With Me

© Sean Nolan 2010

Write some songs of yer own,
Robots.co.uk,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #14: Valentime

2010-02-08T23:36:00.004-05:00

I pretty much wrote this song because I figured 13 songs was unlucky

Valentime

© Sean Nolan 2010

Will you confuse my love for the Robots,
Robotzombiewerewolfapocalypse.com,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #13: The Wedding Ring

2010-02-08T23:29:00.004-05:00

I wrote this song in response to a challenge to write a song from the perspective of an inanimate object...

The Wedding Ring

© Sean Nolan 2010

Shut up, tiny robot doctor,
Two hands Ginobili,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #12: Winter

2010-02-07T22:58:00.001-05:00

Winter

A simple song so erryone can sing along

© Sean Nolan 2010

Will you confuse my love for the Cobwebs,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #11: Sugar Sweetheart

2010-02-07T17:29:00.002-05:00

Sugar Sweetheart

© Sean Nolan 2010

Shut up, tiny robot doctor,
Keep the Dodgers in Brooklyn,
Also, buy records,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #10: Hey Grrl

2010-02-06T14:48:00.003-05:00

"Float like a robot, sting like a robot" - Robo-Muhammad Ali

Hey Grrl

© Sean Nolan 2010

Get lost on Strawberry Wine,
Robotzombiewerewolfapocalypse.com,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #9: Mythology

2010-02-05T16:30:00.003-05:00

Mythology

© Sean Nolan 2010

Will you confuse my love for the Cobwebs,
Keep the Dodgers in Brooklyn,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #8: ...Dreams Of Robots And Lasers And Things

2010-02-04T20:02:00.004-05:00

Srry about the bad werds...

...Dreams Of Robots And Lasers And Things

© Sean Nolan 2010

Robotzombiewerewolfapocalypse.com,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #7: Be (Gone Crazymatron)

2010-02-04T18:04:00.002-05:00

I'm not crazymatron about these lyrics...

Be (Gone Crazymatron)

© Sean Nolan 2010

Shut up, tiny robot doctor,
Keep the Dodgers in Brooklyn,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #6: Keep The Dodgers In Brooklyn!!

2010-02-03T22:01:00.002-05:00

Ok, I ♥ this one...

Keep The Dodgers In Brooklyn!!

Keep the Dodgers in Brooklyn,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #5: Where Are They Now?

2010-02-03T21:03:00.003-05:00

Again, not very thrilled with the result...

Where Are They Now?

Shut up, tiny robot doctor,
Two hands Ginobili,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #4: Gwinnett Is Great

2010-02-03T19:57:00.003-05:00

Not super happy about this one, almost threw it out

Gwinnett Is Great

Shut up, tiny robot doctor,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #3: Dr. Pepper And 100-Proof SoCo

2010-02-02T23:20:00.002-05:00

Dr. Pepper And 100-Proof SoCo

© Sean Nolan 2010

I wonder if I'm allowed to use those names in the song title... Prbly not...

Will you confuse my love for the Cobwebs,
Two hands Ginobili,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

FAWM 2010 Song #2: Heartache Is My Job And I'm Employee Of The Month

2010-02-01T21:30:00.006-05:00

FAWM 2010 Song #1: Robot-Zombie Apocalypse

2010-02-01T20:26:00.006-05:00

Tiny Robot Doctor

2010-01-28T17:11:00.004-05:00

So in the shower just now after I went running, I came up with a pretty great idea for a new cartoon series called Tiny Robot Doctor. I noticed an irritating new little bump on my armpit and wondered what it was. I naturally imagined that a tiny robot doctor floating somewhere just outside my shower considered my request and decided that it was armpit cancer. So I says to him I says "Shut up tiny robot doctor!" So imagined that this could be a whole crazy sidekick relationship where every time I think something's wrong, I ask tiny robot doctor what he thinks and then immediately dismiss his decision with my catchphrase "Shut up tiny robot doctor!!!" The kids will love it. Me and tiny robot doctor will travel the globe fighting crime, cleaning up the environment, and righting all that which had once been wrong. My character will be basically like me except he can prbly fly and halt the flow of time with his imperial battleship. Anyway, I though it was a pretty good idea. I've added some concept art for everyone to visualize the dynamic of the relationship.

Also, the world hasn't seen this. It's a picture by Sean Gleason of Clive Turner fighting a werewolf. It's preview art from his upcoming graphic novelization of the classic film Howling VII: New Moon Rising starring Clive Turner. I just figured more people might need to see it. See the movie, you might regret it.

Also, buy records,
Shut up tiny robot doctor,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Drunk Bowling

2010-01-25T23:42:00.003-05:00

Drunk bowling is the funnest thing you've never done. Unless you have done it. Then it's the funnest thing you've ever done. Remember how you loved to go bowling as a kid? If you didn't you are a Zombieapocalypse and should prbly look into feasting on some brains or somethings, but you prbly can't read, so whatevz. Anyway, imagine if bowling was even cooler than it was. It is... When yer drunk. Of course! Because everything is, except heartache, which is worse, but whatevz. As you start to drink, you get suddenly way better at bowling until you roll like two 300 games in a row, then yer skillz diminishez super-fast. Like Usain Bolt fast. Anyway, it's still super fun. So do it.

Also buy records,
Hugz 'n kissiz,
Sean

Karaoke

2010-01-25T23:35:00.002-05:00

Karaoke is the funnest thing you've never done. Unless you have done it. Then it's the funnest thing you've ever done. Of course most things are fun when you're drunk. And I don't imagine karaoke would really be any fun sober. The real tragedy here though is that I've only really done it a few times. There are so few people who have heard me try to sing songs that are way out of my range. Karaoke is culturally important, and if I'm ever going to be culturally important like I plan to be, I need to do more karaoke. There are some people that don't like karaoke. They are called robots and they are stupid and they are not even people anyway. Zombies prbly don't like it either, but I'm sure werewolves lurv it to bitz. So if you care about yerself, sing karaoke.

Also, buy records.
Will you confuse my love for the Cobwebs,
Two hands Ginobili,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Drunk Songwriting 101

2010-01-24T23:41:00.005-05:00

Drunken Cowgirl Serenade

I think I'm getting worse at this as I get older...

© Sean Nolan 2010

Robotzombiewerewolfapocalypse.com,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,
Sean

Brains

2010-01-10T23:07:00.001-05:00

Why do zombies like to eat brains so much?

Seems weird.

Robot.robot.robot.com/brains,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

Plus Art

2010-01-09T15:58:00.000-05:00

Sorry Vampires!!!

2010-01-09T15:37:00.001-05:00

I don't care about you because you are lame and weak. Plus I know where yer king lives.

Robots.com,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

P. S. - Robotzombieapocalypse

Get Scared... Throw Up... Die...

2010-01-09T14:28:00.003-05:00

Robots robots robots are coming to take over your life. Soon. And zombies. And werewolves. I'm not really scared of zombies because they are stupid. Also, you can just cap them pritti easily. You need silver bullets to kill werewolves, and I don't have any. Also, "Silver Bullets" is an awesome song by Ryan Adams, he's the wolves at the door that yer not supposed to let in. Robots are okay though. I was telling Fiona earlier how I hope that one day you can have sergery to tern you into a robot. Then you could be all robotzombieapocalypse.com all over everybody. Just an update on the world: Lady Gaga is really good, and JONAS is probably the best show on T.V. Mike Bennett is my favorite Jonas Brother, and Joe is a close second. One day robots will probably take over the world, then everybody will have to Star Wars into space and become Jedi. That will be cool, because everyone will have lightsabers, but a bunch of dum kidz will prbly cut they're own arms off, then Tipper Gore will try to get them banned like 2 Live Crew. Also, Ashley is mean.

Also, buy records.

Two hands Ginobili,
Will you confuse my love for the Cobwebs,
Hugz 'n' kissiz,

Sean

Kings Of Leon = Good

2009-05-10T22:27:00.001-04:00

I'm lazy